Its hurts me to know
I’ve hurt others.
Some nights I sleep great.
And on others I lie awake,
Knowing there are people
Who have collected
Wounds and Scars I cannot
Retrieve
I cannot change their hurt.
I can only learn to
Change my actions.
And I do.
And now I must learn to
Forgive myself fully for
Being able to sleep.
For being mad at myself
For it.
For making mistakes,
For expecting myself to be perfect.
I am not.
But I am grateful each person
I’ve caused pain
Has found their way to tell me.
I’m grateful they believed I could receive it.
I am grateful they gave me a chance to
Change.
By Shanai Williams
Hailing from the Bronx, NYC, Shanai Williams is a deeply spiritual and fiercely free creative. With one hand in the ether and the other grounded in community, she is committed to cultivating spaces where Black artists of all ages can connect, showcase their work, and be valued beyond a dollar sign.
Shanai finds art in everything and thrives when blending multiple mediums to create something new. She practiced this interdisciplinary approach by designing her own major—Creative Storytelling—at Wheaton College (MA). Since graduating, she has remained dedicated to producing work that is honest, reflective, and rooted in her connection to the world and those around her.
When not creating, Shanai is in community—often in deep conversation with strangers, exchanging passions and envisioning new possibilities for the world.